Reading time: 2 – 3 minutes
There’s a new phenomenon going on in the fast food game where people are giving you the chicken skin and the little pieces left at the bottom of the bucket and calling them bites. I saw a commercial for Mickey D’s and they had my folk playing pool with each other trying to be cool cuz they got chicken shit scraps in a chinese food takeout holder. This shit right here is what makes me love the Hustle as who would’ve thought Customers want the skin and chicken that falls in the tray at KFC.
Now I know there’s real chicken in there and they tell you white meat… and GOD knows you Suckers want the white meat. But, think about it how much chicken is in there overall. I’m betting there’s one chicken leg of crumbled meat in that damn takeout cardboard and you’re paying 5 bucks for it with a drink and some fries. Someone in Mickey D’s struck gold by saying what about these chicken mcnugget scraps can we do something with those to sell the shit that we throw away. Then someone said sure refry that shit and put some garlic and herbs on that mawfvcker and call it chicken bites. Then the OWNERS said genuis and promoted skippy to head of making products out of shit.
When this commercial comes on I think to myself I’m going to sell the bottom of the slurpee and call it a baby gulp or a spritzer. I’m going to sell the food everyone leaves on the plate at a restaurant and call it Loving Leftovers. I’m going to chop up the shit lettuce leaves no one wants and call it lettuce bites on your salad. I’m going to use the intestines, ears, hove meat and call that …. oh shit I forgot that’s in your fvcking hot dogs already.
It’s funny to watch people sell you spicy scraps of chicken shit then everyone runs around buying popcorn shrimp, popcorn chicken and now fvcking chicken bites. Bada ba ba I’m lovin it!… Fvcking chicken shit!