Abandonment Issues
Reading time: 3 – 5 minutes
People come People go that’s the way life is! You can always tell how young in the game someone is by how they handle people leaving. When you were younger a girl saying she didn’t want to go with you broke your heart. When you were younger when someone said they weren’t you friend it actually meant something. When you were younger when people talked behind your back you were ready to fight. When you were younger you made stupid statements like “If you’re not with me you’re against me” When you were younger you spent entirely too much time thinking about what you did wrong. All the above stemmed from you not accepting that people coming and going in and out of your life is as natural as you taking a piss!
You got to work on letting people go especially when it comes to money. Sometimes it was your right hand man who decided he couldn’t do that with you. Sometimes your family said they can be counted on and when the time comes they are nowhere to be found. All these things happen naturally in life and as such they will happen naturally with money. I tried to bring a lot of my friends and family into my business because I was tired of fighting the world by myself. I made stupid deals with friends because sometimes I want to stop being the boss and go back to being regular old Freeman. I had a lot of ideas that I wanted set up with certain people and when the idea was about to pop they took off for the hills. When I was younger I would get pissed like these cats betrayed me. I would name them my enemy or my future competition when in actuality they weren’t thinking about me at all.
If you open your eyes and stop being so emotional you’ll see all the people who made it are usually by themselves. It is rare to find someone who went from bottom to top with any cat who has money. You’ll read or hear about them having a partner who was with them and then they left. Then the one cat by himself built the whole company and sits on top thinking the cat who left was stupid. Let me repeat that “Then the one cat by himself built the whole company and sits on top thinking the cat who left was stupid!”
You have to calm down and change your abandonment issues and fear of going it alone to realizing maybe the cat didn’t see the bigger picture. What difference does it really make to you accomplishing your goal and realistically when you think about it you were the one with the vision anyway. If you check your perimeter you’ll see that they didn’t take anything away from the idea when they left. You’ll see that their presence was not necessary. You’ll see that actually you are acting like a little girl complaining when the same cat might still be of some use to you since they know exactly what you are doing. If the person didn’t leave in anger why would you create a enemy out of someone who probably had their own thing and couldn’t possibly make your idea number 1.
Real talk you never really know why people get up and leave. Business relationships sometimes mimic romantic relationships in the sense that sometimes they burn bright and seem exciting and then you find out you really aren’t compatible. As a adult you know that this possibility can happen but when it comes to money you throw that possibility out of the window for some teenage hater talk. The higher you get in life the more you realize people have their own lives and you should be thankful that you had the run you had with anyone. I myself built my company with one cat who left 6 months after we started and although I didn’t understand I still say what’s up when I see him. In fact he still tells me stuff that I could look at because he knows exactly what I am doing.
Stop feeling abandoned because the only time you should take this game personal is when someone takes something from you!
Popularity: 3% [?]
Twitter
Youtube
RSS
Email
Facebook
Wow! I think I have made some of the same mistakes in my life. I felt like people were against me when like you said they probably just had something else to do. Wow! Man I think I need you to write a book like a 48 Laws of Hustle or something so I can stick to the script.
Like I said when you’re young in the game you make these mistakes. It’s because you are so self-centered that you take everything personal like someone doesn’t believe in you. The older you get the more you notice no one believes in you and you should reward those who do make a personal sacrifice to bring your idea into being. It’s a life lesson that most people only realize by burning bridges and feeling like a idiot years later.
No books as of yet. I never wanted to be the cat who claims to be the King of all Hustle, as much as I wanted to share what I know so you can pick and choose what will benefit you.
i’m just coming out of that stage where i took everything personal but you right, everyone is out for self, it’s really nothing against me, they just put their own needs first. and if i learned this lesson correctly, i’ll become great at doing this too. great post. have a fab weekend :~)
Well it’s a business deal it’s not a marriage. If you put so much into someone else being there for your idea to succeed it’s your fault not theirs. People have choice and until they bring back slavery you’d be wise to keep in mind that anyone can leave at anytime. Especially if the person is not getting a big share of the money or feels cheated.
The only person not doing for self is the person who is married to you or your own children. Their future is tied into you being ok as they are relying on you. Otherwise out for self is the name of the game with money. Even when I build a business that can help Black people I still am trying to make money. It’s just a win win but let’s not ever doubt that I went into business to make money for myself.
Why do I feel like everyone thinks this way and then grows out of it? I think it’s part of being a teenager to feel everyone is somehow against you. So the lesson is to stop acting like a little girl LOL! You’re right people do have a life of their own and when people leave it can really be because they don’t have the time more than them having a problem with you.
When you first start anything you take everything personal. When you finally get your feet off the ground you really don’t care who’s coming or not. The less people the more money for you.
Freeman- What is your contact info?
Very applicable post. I like the earlier comment “Its a business deal, not a marriage”. Money and success are emotional things, so its understandable in some cases. BTW, like the new layout! Holla
@Soul Rebel – my contact info is freeman@riseandgrind.com
@AP – Thanks on the layout! I think we all have to realize people will go as far as they possibly can. It’s not always a pety reason why cats leave it might have more to do with what’s going on in their lives at the time. I think it’s just smarter not to bank on anyone seeing it to the end but the person who originated the idea.
I actually go by the philosophy that acting in emotion has a higher outcome of being bad than being rational or logical. Good post.
It usually does because it’s based on nothing. Emotion is based off of a feeling and those feelings are usually wrong. It’s just emotions are a drug and people feel more powerful when they use them.
Like I said if they didn’t take anything from you then you have nothing to worry about.